On Censorship and Social Media

I have been dealing with censorship for over 5 years now—long before most people even knew it existed on social media.

Five years ago was when I first began to notice how certain posts would get a limited reach on Facebook--especially the ones concerning my son's "prick" injury, which affected him medically and neurologically. (I hate that I still have to write in code for fear of losing this site as well.) I was sharing what I was learning from credible studies and websites. I believed with everything I had that everyone had a right to make an informed choice--whatever that choice may be.

Two years ago was when things began to get worse. I watched a live conference out of D.C. as the powers-that-be agreed to crackdown on anyone and everyone, who questioned the safety and efficacy of "pricks."

They lied. They skewed the facts. And they said that anyone, who said otherwise needed to be silenced.

They were setting the stage. . .

They just had a similar meeting last week.

Shortly after, my posts were outright deleted or hidden. A friend would screenshot my Facebook page, and I would compare it to what I was able to see, and posts were always missing on her end. It was sneaky and upsetting. Unless you knew what to look for, you could easily be fooled.

I tried paying to boost some of my posts. I wanted so badly to get the truth out, but my requests were often rejected.

I was put in Facebook "jail" a few times. I later got a banner at the top of my page, warning people about my posts. It wasn’t long before the “fact-checking” strips were added all over.

And then, my website "An Upstream Life" took a hit. It went from tens of thousands of monthly views to under 2,000 in a single month. It only went down from there.

I fought for a while but eventually got so very tired of it all.

Seeing them blatantly lie and manipulate everything made me so angry, and I wasn’t a better person for it.

When my site hosting and domain came up for renewal, I decided to let it expire. I copied a few of my posts, and then just let it all go. I know not everyone may agree with that decision, and I heard from some of you who insisted that this was exactly what they wanted. . .

But I needed to take a step back to be a better wife, to be a better mommy. I needed to focus on what was most important.

I stayed off everything for months to clear my head. I began creating curriculum and designing activities for my children--just like I had done for years before when I had worked as a public school educator. I began finding joy once again in just writing to write.

Last July, I decided to launch this Christian homeschool site "Nurturing Connections Homeschool." My heart was to encourage mothers to disciple and protect their children. I saw that the war waged on our children and families went far past the physical, and I longed to create a community of mothers, equipped for the battles at hand. I wanted to share about Jesus and His amazing ways. I wanted to help those who longed to homeschool but didn't know how to get started.

As much as I had a love-hate relationship with Facebook and Instagram, I decided to move forward with them both in order to help spread the word. It wasn’t long, however, before the fact-checking on everything and anything out there began to really wear on me again. I watched Christian pages and anti-abortion pages and natural health pages get blocked and taken down, one by one.

The censorship was no longer being hidden. It was blatant and manipulative and just plain wrong on every level.

And yet, here we were, posting and sharing and liking as if all was right with the world. Here we were, supporting the very system that was manipulating how we thought and perceived the world.

It made me sick.

I hated feeding into a system that sought to silence the stories and values that were near and dear to my heart. I hated seeing the lies that were being propagated. I hated seeing how many were repeating the mainstream rhetoric without realizing the detrimental consequences of it all.

And so, when Instagram decided to come down harder with their Terms of Service, I decided that I was done.

I closed my Facebook and Instagram accounts on December 19th. So many of us did—not knowing where we would go next.

Some of us went to MeWe, others to Parler. Some tried Wimkin and later Gab. I tried all four.

Wimkin lost all my data early on, so I canceled it. Parler grew somewhat quickly for me, and then, it was taken down by Apple and Google and Amazon. (I am doing everything I can to stop purchasing and using their services moving forward!)

I tried Gab, but it was glitchy, so I left. And then, last month, I decided to hunker down in MeWe.

I paid for a page and believed them when they said that they claimed to be a free speech platform. I believed them when they said that they weren’t censoring.

But then, I started seeing people share that their groups had been deleted. I later saw the same claim by those with more prominent platforms, whose pages and/or posts were taken down without warning. I finally heard it happen to a friend.

MeWe has denied all the allegations, claiming that they are neutral and support free speech. I personally do not trust them any longer.

After all that I have been through, I am just so tired of it all.

I may continue sharing on there for a while, but I can't help but wonder if it’s only a matter of time before my voice will be silenced once more. I do not fit the mold.

I battle against it with everything I have.

It frightens me to think what will happen as everything continues to unfold. Where will people find the truth? How will we know what is really happening? And what will happen when the majority only have access to one side? What will they be led to believe? And how will they respond to those who don’t believe? What will become of our nation? Our world?

I’m doing my best to block out the noise. I’m doing my best to stay rooted in God’s word each and every day, for it is only in Him that I have the strength to laugh at the time to come.

Last week, a friend suggested that I try Gab again, so I read more on it all before jumping in. The owner is a Christian, and I appreciated what he had to say about standing strong for free speech. The platform originally had an app that was pulled from the app stores, leading them to recreate the platform to run on any internet browser. They also purchased their own servers and built everything from the ground up.

It was a bit glitchy the last time I was on it, but I tried it one more time last week, and it ran much more smoothly. I was also blessed to have a couple of posts shared by the CEO, and it allowed me to meet so many great people in the online community.

The platform has been getting hit hard by the media, but it really has been such an encouraging place to share my writing with others. I’m hopeful about moving forward with it. I’m also considering moving all of my videos (and future videos) to GabTV. I love the idea of supporting a platform that allows me to share my values without the worry of censorship.

I also like that it does not use manipulative algorithms to influence my online internet usage and behaviors.

The last thing I want to do is fall back into some of the toxic patterns I found myself in with Facebook and Instagram, endlessly scrolling and numbing up to all that was around me. Watching The Social Dilemma helped me better understand how Facebook and Instagram use specific algorithms to manipulate usage, influence behaviors, and create addictive tendencies. It's downright evil.

I’m a wife and mother first. And my role is to nurture and love those The Lord places on my path.

This is the place from which I am able to create a warm home for my family. This is the place from which I am able to serve and restore, to disciple and teach.

This is the place from which I write.

And so, I will protect it with all that I have as I continue to write and share for as long as I can.

I hope you’ll visit and be encouraged. I hope you’ll comment or write back. I hope you’ll share with others that need inspiration or resources.

The “prince of the power of the air” can push and push all it wants, but it won’t silence the truth; it won't control us . . . and it won't break us. (Ephesians 2:1-10)

Maybe all of this censorship is just the push we need to start looking up rather than down.

Maybe this is the push we need to start living instead of just addictively scrolling away this precious gift of time.

Maybe it’s what we need to speak louder, fight harder, and connect with what matters most

Maybe it's what we need to hold fast and stand on His promises and truth.

We are living in a world filled with lies and counterfeits. We're living in a world that hates truth. But though the winds may blow and the rains fall, we know that our Redeemer lives. We have hope.

And one day, dear friend, every knee will bow and every tongue shall confess that He is Lord. (Romans 14:11)

And on that glorious day, there will not be an internet platform or App Store large enough to censor that.

Maranatha.