Does Your Child Need to Go to Preschool?

I used to think that preschool was necessary. Being a former public school educator meant that I was well-versed in the thinking that more school was better for kids. I was an advocate for preschool programs and public early childhood programs . . . until my little one came along.

I can still remember the month following our son’s third birthday. Many of my friends and family had begun asking me about preschool and our plans for the following year. I began to feel the pressure that I needed to be doing something more and decided to visit a nearby preschool.

The school was small, but the rooms were filled with bulletin boards, numbers and letters, blocks and bins, and small tables and chairs. From a teacher’s perspective, it was absolutely dreamy! The principal showed me where the children ate lunch before leading me to a small playground outside of the main building.

My son looked around excitedly, wanting to play with everything in sight. He loved the idea of having a backpack and lunchbox and sitting in the small chairs. I remember leaving with a knot in my stomach.

Did he need to go to preschool? Was I doing him a disservice if I didn’t send him? Would he be ready for school if he didn't attend preschool?

Is Preschool Necessary?

Now, before I dive into options and our choices, I want to stress that I am NOT anti-preschool. I know that it serves as a viable option for some families and can definitely be a blessing for others. What I am against, however, is the belief that it is necessary for ALL of our children to attend preschool to “succeed.” What I am against is the unnecessary pressure being put on parents and little children at earlier and earlier ages in order to pull them away from their homes and diminish their childhood in the name of “academics.”

The idea of preschool is fairly recent and was mainly constructed in an effort to provide childcare for children of working parents. Changing the dynamic from “day care” to “preschool” offered a positive spin on it all, which eventually led to higher and higher expectations for our little ones. These expectations have since created a new pressure on many of us as parents to put our children in preschool in order for them to “keep up” with their peers. But is this really in our children’s best interests?

Studies across the world have revealed time and time again that although academics-based preschools offer short-term benefits upon entering formal schooling, they do not consistently provide long-term benefits to children. Instead, studies have found that they can actually have detrimental effects.

Children placed in preschools with an academic focus were found "to have lower test scores and grades in future grade levels." Many of these children also lost their motivation for learning early on and struggled socially and emotionally. A long-term study even found that this impairment in social and emotional development resulted in later “acts of misconduct” in high school, along with an increase in crime and arrests.

The problem with an early focus on academics, aside from burnout and fatigue, is that children are not being given the opportunity for imaginative play and meaningful social interactions. In a traditional preschool setting, they are spending 6-8 hours a day in a fixed environment, being shuffled from one activity to the next. On the outside, this may look and sound a lot like learning, but what children really need is the opportunity to play, explore nature, and spend time with their loved ones.

Children Need Time to Play

Play is the work of children. Through play, children are able to experience different scenarios and situations, offering safe opportunities for problem-solving, role-playing, and invention. It is the means of development for imaginative thinking and creativity. Free play creates opportunities for children to process their understandings of the world around them and develop the social and emotional skills needed for childhood and adulthood.

Play is also necessary for brain development, creating synaptic connections through interaction and experience. Recent studies have found that play-based preschools offer far greater benefits to children in the early and later years than those focused heavily on academics. The same could be said for play-based kindergartens. In countries, such as Sweden and Finland, where formal instruction is pushed to the age of 7, children achieve higher academic achievement and overall well-being throughout their school years.

Children Need to Explore Nature

I truly believe that children need frequent opportunities to experience God’s creation through their five senses. Playing in grass, walking through a shallow river, collecting rocks and snails, all offer far more growth and development than worksheets done under a fluorescent light. Through sensory interaction with the world around them, children are naturally prompted to wonder, appreciate, ask, observe, and explore.

Nature is calming and offers children the ultimate learning environment. Through nature walks and informal nature “study,” children can learn firsthand about their environment: the flowers, birds, trees, insects, seeds, flowers, and so much more. They can experience the seasons, the rising and setting of the sun, the formation and movement of clouds, and specific habitats of the animals and insects native to their area.

Through naming and observation, they can ultimately develop vocabulary and communication in order to better describe and record their experiences. Through time spent outdoors, the brain is better able to grow and develop further. Nature should truly have a place in every child’s early childhood.

Children Need to Spend Time with their Loved Ones

Spending time with our children is key to helping them develop social and emotional intelligence. When parents spend lots of time with their children, the home becomes their center. At home, the children can learn Biblical values, read stories, and discuss moral responses to different situations.

Through daily interactions with their loved ones, children can become more centered, knowing that they belong and are a part of something bigger. They can feel connected, heard, and loved in a world that is often separate and disjointed. Quality time is important, but I would also venture to say that the quantity of time we spend with our children is of greater importance. It is only through quantity that we can truly embrace the meaningful in the mundane and teach our children what is most important.

Unfortunately, so many of our children are missing these very important parts of their childhood. It is now the norm for children to be expected to “sit still” for hours and months on end, in a single room, under artificial lighting, with other children of the same age, learning skills that they may not even be developmentally ready for.

This “school” time is often followed by screen time at home or other adult-led activities, such as dance, soccer, or little league. None of these things are bad in and of themselves, but they often leave little room or time for what’s most important. Free play, nature walks, and relationship-building are often pushed to the back burner in favor of “academics” and “sports.”

Deciding What's Best for Your Child

If you’re feeling the pressure to put your child in preschool but are not really in favor of it all, I want you to be encouraged. The opportunities you have to nurture your child in love and play are infinite. Trust yourself and embrace these precious, short years with your little one.

If your child is in preschool, I want to encourage you to create opportunities for play, nature observation, and relationship-building in your home. Balancing the time that they spend playing and interacting with you is so very important and can offer numerous benefits in bonding and overall emotional and academic development.

If your child is in preschool and she melts down at the end of each school day, however, it may be worth re-evaluating your options in order to allow more time for these simpler activities that aren’t as highly stimulating. Taking the time to research and pray about what is in the best interest of your child can make a significant difference in the present and future.

Our Choices

In our home, we opted for homeschool preschool for three of our children, but it was only with the last two children where I fully embraced the rich learning opportunities found in everyday life. With our son, I carried the heavy pressure of “academics” and focused on skills that he was not quite ready for. How I wish that I could go back and just snuggle with him and let him play outside!

Over that time, I read more and more on early childhood development, the Montessori method, and Charlotte Mason’s philosophy on education and soon found that the rich opportunities for learning were available to me each and every day in the context of our everyday lives. I just needed to let my children come alongside me and walk with them through it all.

We all have options when it comes to the education of our children. Wherever you land, I hope that this post will inspire new opportunities for connection and learning. I pray that it will open doors to more free play and time outside. It is my hope that we will come alongside our children during this short, but precious time, to love on them and learn alongside them.

Together, let us make the most of these preschool years. Let us nurture the connections with our children.

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Do you need help getting started?

Check out my Preschool/Kinder Bucket Planner! It’s filled with everything you need to create a meaningful preschool and kindergarten at home. From learning buckets and ideas to planning sheets, memory pages, and a video tutorial, you'll have everything you need for your at-home preschool AND kindergarten. Read more about it here!

Or visit the blog for more preschool inspiration and resources.